Bereavement & Grief

Grief is a natural response to loss, but it can feel overwhelming. This guide explains what you might experience and where to find support during bereavement.

Understanding grief

Grief is the emotional, physical, and psychological response to loss. It's different for everyone, and there's no "right" way to grieve.

Common reactions to loss

Everyone experiences grief differently, but common reactions include:

Emotional responses:

• Sadness and tearfulness
• Anger or irritability
• Guilt or regret
• Anxiety or fear
• Numbness or disbelief
• Relief (especially after a long illness)
• Loneliness and isolation

Physical responses:

• Fatigue and exhaustion
• Sleep disturbances
• Loss of appetite or overeating
• Headaches and body aches
• Weakened immune system
• Chest tightness or breathlessness

Cognitive responses:

• Difficulty concentrating
• Memory problems
• Confusion or disorientation
• Searching for the deceased
• Sensing their presence

The grieving process

While grief doesn't follow a neat timeline, understanding common phases can help:

Shock and denial

In the first hours and days, you may feel numb or in disbelief. This is your mind's way of protecting you from overwhelming emotions.

Acute grief

The full weight of loss hits, bringing intense emotions. This is often the most painful period and can last weeks or months.

Adjustment

Gradually, you begin to adapt to life without your loved one. Good and bad days alternate.

Integration

The pain becomes less intense. You can remember your loved one with more joy than sorrow, while still feeling their absence.

Important: These phases aren't linear. You may move back and forth between them.

Coping with grief

Allow yourself to grieve

• Don't suppress your feelings
• Crying is healthy and natural
• Talk about your loved one
• Express emotions in your own way

Take care of yourself

• Maintain regular meals and sleep
• Exercise gently (even a short walk helps)
• Avoid excessive alcohol
• Accept help from others

Stay connected

• Spend time with supportive family and friends
• Join a bereavement support group
• Don't isolate yourself
• Accept that some people won't know what to say

Create rituals and memories

• Visit the grave or special places
• Look at photos and mementos
• Light a candle
• Write letters to your loved one
• Create a memory box

When to seek additional help

While grief is normal, sometimes professional support is needed. Consider seeking help if:

• You're having thoughts of self-harm
• You can't carry out daily activities after several months
• You're using alcohol or drugs to cope
• You're experiencing severe depression or anxiety
• Your grief feels "stuck" or overwhelming

Support services in Ireland

National bereavement organizations

The Irish Hospice Foundation

• National bereavement support line
• Online resources and information
• Phone: 01 679 3188
• Website: hospicefoundation.ie

Cruse Bereavement Care

• One-to-one support
• Group support
• Phone helpline
• Website: cruseireland.ie

Console

• Suicide bereavement support
• Counselling services
• Support groups
• Phone: 1800 201 890
• Website: console.ie

Barnardos

• Children's bereavement support
• Family support services
• Phone: 01 453 0355
• Website: barnardos.ie

Local Dublin services

Glasnevin Trust Bereavement Support

• Free support groups
• Individual counselling
• Located at Glasnevin Cemetery

St Francis Hospice

• Bereavement counselling
• Family support
• Phone: 01 832 7535

Pieta House

• Free therapy for people in suicidal distress or bereaved by suicide
• Multiple locations across Dublin
• Phone: 01 601 0000 or text HELP to 51444

Religious support

Many churches and religious communities offer bereavement support:

• Catholic parish bereavement groups
• Church of Ireland pastoral care
• Other faith community support

GP and mental health services

• Your GP can refer you to counselling services
• HSE community mental health teams
• Employee assistance programmes (if available through work)

Supporting children through grief

Children grieve differently than adults:

• They may not show emotions immediately
• Grief can come in waves
• Play is their way of processing
• They need honest, age-appropriate information
• Routines provide security

What children need

• Honest explanations in simple language
• Permission to ask questions
• Reassurance about their own safety
• Normal routines where possible
• Space to express feelings

Resources for children

• Barnardos Bereavement Services
• Rainbows Ireland (supporting bereaved children)
• Books about grief for different ages
• School counselling services

Grief through the years

First year milestones

The first year brings many "firsts" without your loved one:

• Birthdays
• Anniversaries
• Christmas and other celebrations
• The anniversary of the death

These occasions can be particularly difficult. Plan ahead and ensure you have support.

Long-term grief

• Grief doesn't "end" – you learn to live with loss
• Anniversaries may always be difficult
• You may have setbacks triggered by memories or events
• It's okay to still grieve years later

Practical aspects of bereavement

Immediate concerns

• Registering the death
• Funeral arrangements
• Notifying family and friends

(See our guide "What to Do When Someone Dies" for detailed information)

Financial matters

• Accessing bank accounts and funds
• Dealing with bills and debts
• Claiming benefits and entitlements
• Probate and inheritance

Legal matters

• Grant of probate
• Will and estate administration
• Property and assets
• Professional legal advice

Self-care during bereavement

Give yourself time

• Grief takes as long as it takes
• Don't rush yourself
• Ignore people who say you should "move on"

Be patient with yourself

• Concentration and memory may be affected
• You might make mistakes
• That's normal and okay

Mark special days

• Create new traditions
• Include children in remembrance
• Do what feels right for you

Finding meaning

Many people find that, with time:

• They develop a different relationship with the deceased
• They carry their loved one's memory and values forward
• They find purpose in helping others who are grieving
• They appreciate life more deeply

How Jennings can help

At Jennings, we understand that our care doesn't end with the funeral. We can:

• Provide information about bereavement services
• Offer a listening ear
• Help with death certificates and paperwork
• Guide you through practical matters
• Put you in touch with appropriate support services

Bereavement follow-up

We check in with families after the funeral and are always available if you need:

• Additional death certificates
• Help with headstones or memorials
• Information about support services
• Just someone to talk to who understands

Remember

• Grief is a journey, not a destination
• There's no "right" way to grieve
• Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness
• You will find a way forward
• You're not alone

Contact us

If you're struggling or need information about support services, please reach out:

Call us 24/7: 01 855 4999

We're here to support you, not just through the funeral, but in the weeks and months beyond.